I Just Want Your Attention, Pt. III

In Parts I and 2 we found it pretty easy to identify with Aimee and Jack knowing the right thing to do, but reactively doing the wrong thing instead.

Well, here are the secrets to success:

Keeping the Faith,

You Are the Master of Your Own Fate,

and Quiet Down and Tune In.

These three blogs detail three critical steps to translate your good intentions into action.

First, taking moments daily to remind yourself that you have more control over your survival mind than you think. The more you use a pause to reflect on this, the more likely it will come to your thinking mind in that critical moment between being triggered and acting.


Pull back and STOP the moment you sense you're about to behave reactively. Stop means, freezing the action like either Aimee or Jack saying, "Whoa, this feels familiar, let's take a __ minute (hour, day, whatever is necessary for you two) break before saying anything further.

BREATHE. This is easier if you've agreed ahead of time on this exercise, including how long the break should be and how far apart from each other is necessary to restore calm.

LEAVE, separate as agreed and use the time to restore the balance between your survival and thinking minds.

Third, once "back in your right mind," (a term I'll discuss in the future), open a space to allow a resolution of the tension to come to you rather than try powering your way to a solution.

#relationships #thinkingmind #survivalmind #frustrated #couples #intimacy #resolution #solution #practicalsteps

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